Sunday, July 24, 2011

Six Sentence Sunday



Here's another excerpt from my current WIP Thirst, part 2 of All-American Vampires

They’d been gone for so long now that even their bones were nothing more than dust. But tonight was one of the rare times Hawk let those memories through. When he allowed himself to see their faces, to remember their smiles and their dark laughing eyes. Ahawi, his beautiful wife--Inola, his precious daughter.  They had died of the white man's fever around this same time of year, and it didn’t matter that more than two centuries had passed. The pain was still as real, as immediate, as it had ever been. 





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59 comments:

  1. Wow, powerful six. Loved the description in the first line and the feeling through out - especially the last line - was very well conveyed.

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  2. Wow! very powerful six. I love old and wise-ish vamps. They always have such amazing lives.

    xx
    A.

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  3. Just beautifully written. A great selection!

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  4. this is a beautiful, heartfelt snippet...the sorrow, the reflection. You had my heart bleeding for him xxx and in just six sentences! kudos!

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  5. a wonderful real, tender and painful snippet. I felt his grief, so beautifully written. Thank you very much for sharing.

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  6. Beautifully written. Very emotive!

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  7. Wonderful evocation of his pain--very real and immediately recognizable as such by anyone who has suffered loss of a loved one. Moving six. Well done.

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  8. memories do not die - not even after centuries. Very nice snippet

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  9. You make your immortal or very-long-lived character real and human in these six lines, incidentally also placing him in historical and cultural context. Losses are real, no matter how long ago... and that goes for historical losses as well as personal ones.

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  10. I'm hoping he finds someone to ease his pain and loneliness.

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  11. Lovely writing and not often we see this side of a vamp

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  12. I don't really read vampires, but this does seem really unusual -- and insightful. Nice job.

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  13. Very good emotion that really brings the pain to life.

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  14. Awww...Sad! My heart aches for him! Such loss!

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  15. Wow, I like him. He's faithful to his past love and soooo alone. Beautiful six.

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  16. This six reminds me that the pain of losing someone never truly fades, you just get used to pushing it to the back of your mind. Excellent, moving six!

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  17. Intense! I felt his pain...great job, Bree!

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  18. There are draw backs to living forever! Powerful stuff.

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  19. Powerful and emotional. Beautifully written six.

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  20. Love this. A lot. Beautiful description of his pain (if that sort of thing can be beautiful).

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  21. oooh, great six! I agree with the others - very powerful.
    =)
    C.R. Moss

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  22. Poignant and beautiful. Love the twist on the vamp story!

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  23. Beautifully written. I feel his pain deeply, and wish for him to find love again.

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  24. His pain shines through your six. I wonder at the age, and what he is.

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  25. I love this story already! Do you have a pub for it (someone you're working with?). I want to buy the book. Love your pic, too.

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  26. His pain comes across very well. Great six!

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  27. Wow! Amazing scene and intriguing characters. :)

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  28. Hi, everyone. Thanks so much for reading and commenting.

    @Lauri...my first book in the series, Burn, was epubbed with Siren Publishing. This is the second book of that series. :)

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  29. @Hailey...Hawk is a vampire. He's about 250 years old and was turned when he was 25. :)

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  30. Very powerful and evocative (and mysterious). Well done.

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  31. '...their dark laughing eyes.' That's lovely and poignant.

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  32. Great 6. Emotional and riveting.

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  33. A native American vampire? AWE! Wanna know more!
    Barb
    (p.s. and the pic is gorgeous)

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  34. Very powerful and evocative. Lovely six sentences.

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  35. Oh, I love this post. You've given us a snippet of back story and told a lot about the character in just those few sentences. Nicely done.
    (Thanks, too, for commenting on my post.)

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  36. I love this one Bree. Great peice of character backstory nicely written.

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  37. You're breaking my heart! Beautiful, well-written six.

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  38. Wow, I especially liked your first line...

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  39. What a powerful six. You can really feel his pain and agony

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  40. Lovely six. I enjoy a vampire with depth.

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  41. This six gave me goose bumps. You really drew me into the story.

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  42. Great depth of feeling and an original concept with the Native American vampire. Intriguing six!

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  43. Nothing like a tortured vampire! Love!

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  44. Lovely writing, sad story. And a Native American vampire? I'm intrigued.

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  45. I always enjoy the 6s from this book, and today's no different. I love that there's a Native American vampire character. Sucks to live with that pain for centuries. I guess being undead clearly has it's downside! :(

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  46. The writing in this snippet is lovely. This may be inappropriate to admit with such a dark excerpt but I find the idea of a Native American vampire so. Very. Hot!

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  47. Wow, nice! I can't imagine being in that kind of pain for that long...

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  48. Oh no - this is so sad and poignant!

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  49. Very thought provoking...time may pass but love and feelings were never fading...great 6 Bree.

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  50. Awe, that is so lovely but so sad!

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  51. Really well written. Well done! :)

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  52. Oh, that's so sad. Very nice six.

    Sorry I'm late, but glad I stopped in to read it.

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